Back To Bones

I feel it coming up my spine
It has started again, I have crossed that line
That line I have been trying so hard not to cross
But it is all that is left when all else is lost
It's a form of control, I know that now
I can't keep anything I put in down
It's the only way I know how to cope
When there is no reason left for me to hope
Heart is shattered, torn to bits
Only one person knows how that puzzle fits
Back together to make me once more whole
But that person knows, that they own the control
It is not a fault of anyone that this is me
It is just the way my mind chose for me to be
Just a little girl hoping and waiting for love
To have, to give to hold high above
Put you on a pedestal, my heart says that is where you belong
Push myself down as far as I can go
Under your feet and muddy from the dirt
Laying below, in pain from the hurt
Do you even see it? It appears you do not
Leave me here alone, soon I shall begin to rot
And shrink and die and turn back to bones
Is this what you wanted?
It is only you who can truly know